THE ART OF BEING LAZY, A QUICK GUIDE

We’re all lazy, we try not to be, but you know and I know that if you can, you’d sleep right through the day. Being lazy is an art form that not a lot of people know how to pull off, for some people being lazy is a full time job, a 24/7 full time job.

Waking up every morning is the first step to being lazy, wake up early, get out of bed and have a hearty breakfast, being lazy on an empty stomach takes away from energy better spent on laziness. Now the first thing you do after waking and eating your breakfast, is get your ass on the couch, stretch out and relax, do you have an appointment early in the morning, big mistake.

Rule#1: Never schedule an appointment early in the morning.

After relaxing on the couch, while watching a little early morning TV, go rest again in bed. Going to bed in the morning is the best part and the main reason for waking up early. This stage of the day can last as long as you want, don’t spend too much time in bed though, the day is not over yet.

Ideally get out of bed a little before noon, although if you want to spend more time in bed, go ahead. Once out of bed, change into something more comfortable, never over dress, I personally prefer a loose fitting jeans with a sweatshirt.

Rule#2: Never wear clothes that would hinder you

Sitting or lying down comfortably on a bed or sofa should always be comfortable. Loose fitting clothes are always in fashion.

The general rule for meetings or shopping that you have to do outside the house is distance and convenience, always try to go to areas that are close to where you live, have easy transportation options or parking, if you’re scheduling the meeting, set it up somewhere close or even better let them come to you.

Rule#3: Never do more than one thing a day.

Once the meeting or chore is over, your day is done, go relax, if you can, have a snack. Mid day snacking is an important part of your daily schedule, it not only gives you an excuse to stop working but also gives you a chance to sit down and eat. Turning your lunch break into a traditional 3 course meal is not an easy task, very few employees have successfully mastered the art of telesnacking.

Working

A 9 to 5 job should not hinder your goal of being lazy, the same rules apply, the difference is time and location.

Someone will disagree and say you can’t work in a stable job and be as lazy as you are, I would disagree, if you commit yourself, you will find a way to make it work anywhere you are. Work is no different, it is and has been about making your employers get used to your schedule not the other way around.

With time, your employers will even appreciate the extra burst of energy that you throw their way. The trick is to pace yourself, one thing a day and never ever change your routine, that would be too much work.

Coming home in the afternoon gives you more time to relax, take your time undressing and changing again into your home clothes. A nice hot shower is a welcome addition to an already relaxing day.

Nothing beats a nice hot shower except sitting in bed naked under the sheets after that shower and snoozing for 10 minutes. After which you could go to sleep, or better yet, sit and watch TV, your excuse; disconnecting from the stress of the day.